CRPTNR: Celtic Connections Gig

On Friday 27th of January I had the absolute pleasure of performing with the one and only Owen Sutcliffe (CRPNTR) in a support slot for Bella and the Bear. 

Celtic Connections: CRPNTR / Robbie Gordon

Celtic Connections: CRPNTR / Robbie Gordon

hi im calvin

but you can call me next door neighbour

my days taste like chipped plant pots

and urgent imagined handjobs

iv forgotten lots and lots

seems to have forgotten me


Hi, Im no Calvin

and I’ll take to sea on a paper boat

made the day before on crumpled A4 

from an undelivered leaving note

signed, sealed and unsent


i twiddle my thumbs in the job centre

used to odds and ends but wanting being at odds to end

exercise in the form of

random dashes to the bathroom

and offie sprints at ten to ten…

(pushing it)


i have parents like you do;


strong along the way but dropped

my gaze,

focussed on the cobbles

cobbled together...

myself all of a sudden


straight to an automated answer phone 

where I vent

embroidered plans of leaving you

and frame it as an artwork entitled patchwork 

which leaves us both in stitches 

swally surrounding liquid and get granted 3 pishes

tell you, I’ll leave

after the beep 

I'll key hash to delete

didact footspteps left by dulcet tones

murmured moans become beacons of light

we are passing ships in the night  

you’re the titanic

and I’m a gigantic prick

picking a new coping strategy 

to take with me on the voyage across our ocean

along with a bottle to with no message in

because I’ve got nothing but shite to talk, eh?


hi im calvin

but you can call me whatever you like, if I’m honest

last year tasted bland: lunchables and soggy quavers

i achieved little

dreamt until my pockets sagged

with dewy gaze, i learn and relearn

the patchwork of the living room wall.

hi I’m cal….


right! mate!

stop spouting shite… mate...


I’m no calvin and he isnae either


"Calvin" by Owen Sutcliffe and Robbie Gordon

Robbie GordonComment